- Subscribe
Socialize
Dear Janice,…
Dear Janice, Your boyfriend’s got a big tumor, huh? Well, you know what they say about guys with big tumors, right? They’ve got big cancer! I don’t know why I…
Dear Timmy,…
Dear Timmy, When I told you you had the recessive gene, I didn’t mean that you had a gene that makes you enjoy recess. I meant that you had a…
Dear Passengers,…
Dear Passengers, Welcome to Philadelphia, PA. We’ve just landed and are almost ready for you to start exiting the plane. In the interest of making the exiting process as quick…
Dear Dumbledore,…
Dear Dumbledore, You know that nice little time-turner you gave Hermione so she could make it to Herbology and Transfiguration? Yeah, what about using that to make us, like, not dead?…
Dear Literary Critics,…
Dear literary critics, How come Shakespeare is so praised for stuffing words he made up into his writing, but when I sarjurjur rubzit you don’t even coltfly tambo? Borgsatch, Toby…
Dear Harkness Tower,…
Dear Harkness Tower, How come everyone makes all the penis jokes about you? I’m way bigger than you are, and I’m just as phallic. Is it because I’m all the…
Dear American Red Cross,…
Dear American Red Cross, It has come to my attention that you teach the Heimlich maneuver in all your life-saving courses. Well, in my opinion, it is just as important…
Dear Little Engine That Could,…
Dear Little Engine That Could, Sometimes thinking isn’t enough. Fuck you and your little hill. Disdainfully, Sisyphus…
Scrapbook
Sex Before the Internet #8
When small talk won’t work.
Who’s Who #14: Bill Murray
A Cinderella story.
Sound Advice
I bet she throws like a girl.
Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell
Disregard the ad; I’ll hump anything that moves.
Girl Power #3
And to think she’s doing it backwards in heels.
Sex Before the Internet #7
10 bucks says that guy has some performance anxiety tonight. Any takers?
Recent Comments