- Subscribe
Socialize
Dear Steve Jobs,…
Dear Steve Jobs, What the fuck, man? This new iPod Mini is just too small. It’s barely bigger than my Motorola Razr or Lance Armstrong’s flaws! It’s freaking me out,…
Dear Cassandra,…
Dear Cassandra, I’m sorry, but I just don’t love you anymore. —The subtext of what your boyfriend just told you about needing to find himself Dear Jake, It sort of…
Dear antique store,…
Dear antique store, You were built in 2011. False advertising. Literally, Stan…
Dear Pamela,…
Dear Pamela, Gee, you were right. Sex in the kitchen was awesome! First we were forking… then we were spooning…then we were knifing…or rather, I was knifing; you were screaming.…
Dear mixed nuts,…
Dear mixed nuts, Your message of integration and harmony sickens me. I remember when the rich ruled the world of nuts. Those were better times. —Mr. Peanut, while wearing two…
Dear Macklemore,…
Dear Macklemore, Look at you, soooo controversial. You thinking you’re such a big deal, huh? Well, someday my time will come, too! Then you’ll see…then you’ll all see! —Mackleless…
Hey folks,…
Hey folks, Have you ever noticed how life is meaningless? —Depressed Jerry Seinfeld Hey folks, Have you ever noticed how when women are trying out perfume they always spray a…
Dear scarf,…
Dear scarf, Stop choking me. —Another scarf Dear scarf, That’s what you get for sleeping with my wife. —The first scarf…
Scrapbook
Sex Before the Internet #8
When small talk won’t work.
Who’s Who #14: Bill Murray
A Cinderella story.
Sound Advice
I bet she throws like a girl.
Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell
Disregard the ad; I’ll hump anything that moves.
Girl Power #3
And to think she’s doing it backwards in heels.
Sex Before the Internet #7
10 bucks says that guy has some performance anxiety tonight. Any takers?
Recent Comments