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Preview: Puss in Boots
PG for feline swashbuckling, hairball jokes, seamless integration of stereotypes about Hispanics with stereotypes about cats…
Preview: The Rum Diary
R for roguish Johnny Depp, shabby hotels, all the cool kids drinking tequila to the point of blackout…
Preview: Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn, Part 1
PG-13 for pasty-faced spouses, tedious love triangles, helpless swooning…
Preview: Tower Heist
PG-13 for poor stealing from the rich, rich stealing from the poor, super-rich stealing from everybody…
Preview: In Time
PG-13 for promise of immortality, promise of sexy old people, ever-so-faint hint of a metaphor…
Review: The Artist
PG-13 for glitzy special effects, shameless commercialism, blatant pandering to the black-and-white-silent-film-loving masses…
Apollo 18
PG-13 for trembling cameraman, torso infections, baseless libel against the excellence of the moon I am sick and tired of movies like this trying to convince me I don’t want…
Scrapbook
Sex Before the Internet #8
When small talk won’t work.
Who’s Who #14: Bill Murray
A Cinderella story.
Sound Advice
I bet she throws like a girl.
Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell
Disregard the ad; I’ll hump anything that moves.
Girl Power #3
And to think she’s doing it backwards in heels.
Sex Before the Internet #7
10 bucks says that guy has some performance anxiety tonight. Any takers?
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