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Dear scarf,
I just wanted to thank you for keeping my neck so warm.
—Jesus doing that thing where he walks around with a sheep around his neck
__________
Dear Jesus,
This is making me really uncomfortable.
—That sheep
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Δ
When small talk won’t work.
A Cinderella story.
I bet she throws like a girl.
Disregard the ad; I’ll hump anything that moves.
And to think she’s doing it backwards in heels.
10 bucks says that guy has some performance anxiety tonight. Any takers?
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