“Not Drinking” with Not DKE Monday, 10:00 PM @ DKE House

Last year, the Office of Student Affairs decided that freshmen should not be allowed to participate in fraternity and sorority rush events until the second semester of the year. Because their fraternity house will thus not be able to be used for freshmen events, the fraternity DKE has graciously allowed Yale Students for Responsibility (or some other Boy Scout group) to host an event in their house that doesn’t involve any drinking. It probably involves some sort of boring workshop on how to drink responsibly and have responsible sexual interactions. There will also be lame drinks like tea and fruit punch. Anyway, all of the freshmen should come, and it if any of them have an ake-fay it’d be nice for them to bring a andle-hay of ubra-Day.

“Movies and Munchies!” with the Film Studies Department Wednesday, 9:00 PM @ Every Residential College Movie Theater

Think you might want to major in Film Studies, but worry that watching several movies a week might be a little too much work? Come give it a try now by watching movies with faculty from the Film Studies Department while partaking in some delicious New Haven food! Drop by Silliflicks for “The Thali Too Towers.” The Ezra Stiles Crescent Underground Theater will be hosting “It’s a Wenzelful Life.” Or stop by Calhoun for “Schindler’s List…of All the Different Kinds of Claire’s Cake!”

“Death by Chocopologie” with the Office of Undergraduate Admissions Monday, 4:00 PM @ Undergraduate Admissions Office

Last year, the Office of Undergraduate Admissions accidentally admitted too many students, resulting in a potentially uncomfortable housing situation for this year’s freshmen. To make up for this inconvenience, Undergrad Admissions is hosting a delicious study break catered by Chocopologie! These gourmet chocolates will be delicious, and will definitely not have been poisoned in an effort to correct the Office of Undergraduate Admissions’ mistake.

“We Have Culture, Too!” with the Caucasian Cultural House Tuesday, 11:00 AM @ TBD

White students of Yale, do you ever feel as though your racial background is devoid of cultural significance? Good cultural significance, I mean – not all that tragic stuff about oppression and discrimination and – worst of all – putting Nicholas Cage in more movies. Well, we’re here to tell you that you, a white person, do have a claim to culture – even if you’re not gay or Jewish! Come to pleasant brunch with the Caucasian Cultural House, after which we will partake in a thrilling game of croquet. A variety of “white” foods will be served, from corn dogs to tuna salad to a fruit and cheese tray (we also ask that everyone bring a homemade casserole). Note: If no space can be found to host the brunch, “We Have Culture, Too!” will take place in one of Yale’s other four cultural houses.

—L. Sedlacek